dreams

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Unschooling Goals: Turning My Daydreams Into a Rambling Reality

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Have you ever paid attention to the feeling you get when you think of a person, place, career, or future possibilities that excite you? Maybe it’s my personality type or something, but I can point out certain things in my life that I’ve learned about and they instantly resonated with me on a deep, sometimes unexplainable level.

As an adult, I’ve come to connect this feeling with things or subjects that are somehow in line with my purpose - aligned with who I am at my core. I’ve experienced this feeling countless times with many things in my life, and I’ll write about those in a later post.

The more I grow and detach from insignificant societal norms and become more aware of myself and the world that could be, the more authentic I feel I am becoming.

Something is happening in my soul.

I find myself dreaming of, journaling, and talking with the Universe more and more about homeschooling my son(s) (unschooling, adventure schooling, road-schooling, etc.) and traveling on a semi-full-time basis. I know more families are doing this now, but most still consider it a pretty radical thing to do.

I told myself 2020 is the year it is going to start, and you guys…my planner and notebook are packed with plans down to the tiniest details. I’m talking vintage RV style…a Rambling Hippie on a mission! It’s something I have fantasized and talked with friends/family about doing for years, but it seemed like such a distant dream, yet alone a real possibility within the next few years.

If all of these self-development and entrepreneurial books I’ve been reading over the last 5 years have taught me anything, it’s that if you want something, you write it down and get serious about a plan..you may be surprised how quickly it will manifest.

I blame this vision of traveling and unschooling on the incredible experiences and insight my grandparents provided me with as a kid, my liberating solo trip to Palo Duro Canyon for my 26th birthday, my ‘86 Volvo station wagon (RIP Pearly), my mom, and the following books in the order in which I read them. All are available on Audible btw - click here to purchase a gift membership for someone to inspire them, or on one of the links below to start your free trial.

…along with countless hours spent researching and reading articles about American school systems and the alternatives, listening to podcasts, reading forums, Facebook group discussions about homeschool and RV living, and just being a whole damn hippie at heart. *Side note - and I love side notes - I believe we’re all hippies at heart, craving love and peace, but that’s another talk.

“ I’m just making my way home. I’m on a path leading to the me I was meant to be,
before external factors and limiting beliefs hindered my greatness.”
— Ladye M

Since I had my firstborn almost twelve years ago, I’ve known I wanted to expose him to more of the world, more culture, more history, bigger ideas. I believe exposure to diversity at a young age - whether through experiencing diverse cultures and religions, history, landscapes, ideas, etc. - when seen through a perspective of love and acceptance (this is where parents/teachers come in), is an effective catalyst to positive change. I didn’t get much of that growing up in the Rural South and it is absolutely something I want for my children, grandchildren, and so on.

I long to give my kids meaningful and impactful experiences in this life. I want them to see love (or God/the Universe if you will) in every human, every animal, every landscape. I want us to cultivate love and change together, even if on a small scale. And yes, I realize this sounds like a romantic hippie dream at this point, but I know the BTS work and at times, utter discomfort that this will require.

How can I turn this daydream into a reality?

Initially I couldn’t quite visualize what unschooling while traveling would look like. Like..do I have to buy a big truck and camper and go back to my country roots to make this a real and comfortable-for-the-kids possibility? Staying in short term apartments or Airbnb’s in different places sounds too irresponsible for a single mother (major eyeroll here).. or at least it would to my family and likely my son’s dad.

So how can I make it happen before my kids are grown? Well, I think I know just the way.

If all goes according to plan - and trust me, I am entirely prepared for many things to not go according to plan - this new reality will kick off with a Spring Break trial run, after which I will share my soon-to-be-excecuted two-year travel plan with deets! (People still say deets, right? IDK…I’m in this Awkward Millenial phase where I’m not quite sure which slang is current and which is outdated.)

I will def be back here for more talks on the subject.

If you or someone you know has gone full-time RV or van life, drop a comment and let me know your take. I love hearing different perspectives and pros and cons! Also, if you’re interested in more of my Audible recommendations, let me know.

Love and light,
Ladye

Let's Play the Quiet Game: Writing to Liberate My Inner Child

Shhh let's play the quiet game

As a child, I was reprimanded for chatter on a pretty regular basis. From age three on, I have vivid memories of parents, daycare ladies, teachers, and grandparents asking me to keep it down. Although my mom probably indulged my curiosity more often than anyone else, my questions were often met with answers like “Ladye, shhh.” “Ladye please, that’s enough talking.” “Ladye, why don’t we play the quiet game?”

Naturally, my elementary school teachers viewed my talking as a distraction. My report cards always had all A’s, but you can bet they also had notes in the Comments section that usually went along the lines of “Intelligent girl, but disrupts class by talking out of turn” or “Incessant talking, otherwise great student". I would get in trouble for asking the teachers too many questions during lecture, or for chatting with friends after I’d finished my work. I never recall being sent to the office (except that time I took my skirt off in 4th grade to reveal basketball shorts underneath), but I definitely remember teachers rolling their eyes, and some getting very obviously annoyed with me as soon as my hand went up in class. I loved learning, I just loved talking about it even more.

I’ve discovered as an adult that I actually have ADHD (which explains a LOT), but I’m not sure that insight would’ve changed much back then. I was Ladye Loudmouth. I wanted to know and discuss ALL. THE. THINGS.

If I was told something was one way, I wanted to know why it wasn’t the other way. I had why’s and how’s for just about everything, and if anyone asked my opinion (as if they had to) I was ready and willing to share. In retrospect, I know I lacked self-awareness, but I also realize the adults around me weren’t quite as curious about the world as I was.

As I was working the other day, I had this breakthrough:

The reason I find it so hard to speak in front of a group or put my writing out there is because subconsciously I’ve developed the belief that no one is interested in what I have to say. People who know me may not believe this, but I’m initially very self-conscious about talking to groups or new people, especially if I have to carry on with small talk. I also take way longer than what most would deem necessary to respond to an e-mail or send an important text. This seems silly, because bosses and colleagues have praised my writing, and I’ve even been encouraged to write books. Yet still, I’m afraid I’m going to say the wrong thing, be misperceived, or be unable to hold readers’ attention. 

Yess…I know my story about the dead squirrel in my son’s backpack went viral, but I never gave myself much credit for writing about it because let’s be real… Brylan’s story told itself, and the photo was the real Point of Interest (thanks Principle Goff!).

Even with decent writing, you can’t forget the grammar critics. I like to use improper sentence structures and unnecessary words from time to time, like how am I going to deal with knowing someone out there will read these things and think I don’t know what I’m doing?

Sounds like a bunch of neurotic excuses, eh? Yep, I know. Excuses and anxiety…eff them both.

In writing this blog, I’m putting my curious thoughts and ramblings out there for the world. I owe it to the little elementary school Ladye who was so curious, yet constantly silenced. I share my thoughts here to liberate my inner child and to give my children documented insight into who their mom is/was. I hope that through all my ramblings, someone out there will be healed or touched in some way by my experiences and inspired to conquer a fear or insecurity of their own.

Have you decided to conquer a fear or start/finish something this year? What is it? How have you kicked anxiety in the past to pursue a passion? I’d love to hear from you in the comments!

Love and light,
Ladye